what is it in me..

“bakit ganun, Jocelle.. pag malungkot kasama ka, pag masaya na, wala ka na?” –a friend once asked me in High School.

He figured this out kase… once there was a group of 5 girl friends. Then one day, 4 of them had a conflict with 1. So yun girl, out of nowhere, bigla na lang sumasama sa akin – sa umaga pag recess, sa lunch, sa library, sa groupings of pairs, kahit hanggang pagsabay mag-CR.

After how many weeks, okay na sila nung circle of friends nya (na friends ko rin naman). Happy na sya, wala na syang tampo sa kanila..

One afternoon, uwian.. while I, my close friend Conrad, and our close friend(/teacher) were talking about something, the 5 girls passed us by and all them happily bid us byebye for the day.

Nung makaalis na un mga girls na yun.. suddenly, inakbayan ako ni teacher at Conrad, then he asked: “bakit ganun, Jocelle.. pag malungkot kasama ka, pag masaya na, wala ka na?”

I answered them while laughing: hindi ko alam.. ganun talaga.. 🙂

Madalas mangyari sa akin ‘to.. and it always makes me 50% laughing at the thought that “oh well, happy na sya kaya nakalimutan na naman ako”, and 50% thinking “ano bang meron..?”

Am I really for the sad parts only?

If my friends’ lives were a book, do I only come at the sad chapters?

If it were a movie, do I only play the cameo role..?

It’s so sad.

Maybe it’s a nice thing to know, that people remembers me when they’re sad because that means, I’m nice to have during sad times..?

I wonder.

I doubt.

I don’t know.

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